Thursday, July 5, 2007

I didn't get a compliment

Wow. The tiredness just doesn't go away! I slept for probably 10 hours last night, woke up, went and got a massage (not a big pick-me-up, but TOTALLY worth it!!) I went to lunch with my BEAUTIFUL perfect little sister (while we were there an old lady walked up to her out of the blue, cupped her face in her hands and said "Ah, to be young and beautiful again!) Why can't I be happy for other people when they get compliments?? Anyway, after that, I came home and my oldest little boy wanted me to lie down with him. Of course, I crashed. Slept for almost 3 hours. And now, do I feel rested and ready for this post-4th-of-July party at my parents?? No, I feel like I could sleep for a week!! Maybe someday I'll feel rested!!??
I'm trying to decide if I'm on a diet or not. I need to be, that's for sure. It just seems like such a daunting task. At the very VERY least, I have 50 pounds to lose. I know it can be done, I've read of people doing it. Heck, I did it in my early 20's. Then, I worked at a desk job, so whatever I brought with me or bought on my lunch break, I ate. It was easy! I just brought a bunch of fruit every day. My indulgence was coffee. Now, I'm pretty much home all day. I mostly don't even think about what I'm eating. Whatever the kids eat, or whatever I feel like eating, I eat. I start Weight Watchers every Monday, and by Tuesday I'm not logging my food again. The only consistent thing I do for exercise is my Monday night volleyball for 3 hours. I want to do Pilates once a week, but I usually have some excuse for not dragging myself to the gym on Wednesdays (maybe the top on that list is I'm embarrassed about myself in the class because the 90 year old ladies can do EVERY pose while I'm struggling.)
One of these days I'm going to surprise everyone and have a positive entry on here! Ha ha!
My twins are vying for my attention right now, so I'll cut this depressing ramble short.

1 comment:

Tina said...

I know, I LOVED last night. I'm already thinking about what to do for Julia's birthday in August. Ideas? Oh and most of them leave sometime in August. A NYC trip right around then would be PERFECT but I have to figure out exact days they are leaving. Oh I had an idea this morning to make a memory book for each of the girls, kind of like what you did for me (with Budapest) but also with other things.. maybe in scrapbook-y form. I'm so tired. I called Glenn and said I'd be late. About to drink my D&D... Oh and I have the WORST cramps. OUCHIE. Tonight's the study so I'm headin' over there otherwise I would have come crash at your house in the pool. It's BLAZIN' outside!